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Deliberate Development

Professional Development for the Military Leader

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Developing Others

Daily Deliberation: 13 February 2020

I was once told others don’t remember what you say; rather, they remember how you made them feel. We have seen this in action and probably are guilty of it ourselves. I know I am. Think about someone you respect. They just forfeited on a promise they made to you. Maybe they missed a meeting or are late on something they were supposed to deliver. Most likely, you are upset, but think they missed it because something important must have come up. You made an excuse for them without knowing any facts. Now, what if it was someone you don’t like? You’re probably already typing an email to his supervisor. What changed? Nothing. Only the way this person made you feel.

Daily Deliberation: 12 February 2020

I love this. So often we do something good for others and then want to tell everyone what we did. When I do this, I ask myself: “Did I do this for them or for me?”

Daily Deliberation: 10 February 2020

A lot of times we ask the wrong questions as we are seeking feedback from peers and superiors. Ask “How can we work better together?” instead of “What am I doing wrong?” It is very hard to point out the negatives to others. Have you ever had that counseling session where you had to tell a troop they were the stinky kid? Definitely not an easy thing to do. When we seek growth feedback, know it is not easy for the other person either and set them up for success.

Daily Deliberation: 8 February 2020

It is amazing the moment a leader realizes that the goal is not to have a team of followers but a team of leaders. When you do not empower and develop your team, you have to think for each one of them and direct them accordingly. When you are doing that, you can’t accomplish anything else. When you empower and train your team, you are now thinking about the big picture and moving the organization forward. You can focus on where you’re going and how to develop even more leaders.

Daily Deliberation: 5 February 2020

This is something I am struggling with a lot lately. As I try to define who I am and what I want my future to look like, I am trying to discover what my “art” is. I know what I am good at and what I like to do, but what are others willing to pay me to do.

Daily Deliberation: 30 January 2020

I have worked for and with so many people who simply could not control their cool. Some of them were scary to be around in high-stress scenarios and others were actually fun to get spun up. I watched wrenches, clipboards, coffee mugs, and many other objects fly across the room or flightline and even a couple people who began to dry heave. All because of stress. Now, everyone else on the plane or team was experiencing the same stress factors, we just had a different response. When you are leading a team and things begin to crumble, it is normal to feel stressed. It is normal to want to throw something, swear or whatever. However, you can’t let your team see this, because they are looking to you to be their rock. I bet the guy in the picture is stressed out; however, he knows he has to remain calm for his team.

Daily Deliberation: 18 January 2020

Whenever I take the time to share something I value with my team it seems to grow exponentially. Sometimes it is a factoid I discovered by accident in some obscure Air Force pub that helps to solve a problem at a later date. I know this has happened to me many times. I was talking to someone and they shared a seemingly random piece of information with me and within just a few days, I was able to use that information. I am not sure what the lesson is, but this quote made me think about it.

Daily Deliberation: 9 January 2020

I read in a Harvard Business Review article about the power of appreciation. The author said that those who don’t feel appreciated at work have a 30% higher rate of coronary disease than those who do. We are literally killing our teammates by not appreciating their efforts or listening to their concerns. Now, think about all the times you felt valued at work and how much harder you worked for that team. Why not create the same environment where you work?

Daily Deliberation: 4 January 2020

Over the years, I continually hear great leaders compare being a leader at work to parenthood. We love our children and want them to succeed. We don’t alienate them or label them as losers when they mess up. They always know they have a place on the team even if they mess up. However, we also are willing to correct them and offer growth feedback because we want them to succeed, not because we want a “world’s best parent” coffee mug. We care more about their success than about being a friend. How is this any different than being a leader?

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